TWO KINDS OF DESIRE

My mind is sober through the night.
My hands are just a glass too deep.
If you leave before I wake,
I pray to you, don’t speak.

If you want to leave, just go.
If you want to go, don’t stay.
Don’t stay because you feel compelled to tell me this was good for you.
Though, it was quite good for me too.

The words I’ve spoken to you only I remember,
And they weigh me down with a lust to wander.
You’re what I never knew and I may never know
Unless I again open my eyes and I see two kinds of desire
And a guise of myself floating in this desire.
I drown, but am engulfed in this bedroom of fire.

In the morning we flee home.
Though, together, our thoughts tend to keep us alone.
So you’ll say goodbye to a more handsome time
That you may have had with some other guy.

Could he compete with me
When I’ve already won the game?
As the sun came up to shine a light on his debt,
You kept yourself awake with my name.
While he tried to find bullshit shapes in burnt out southern stars,
I was on my back, your and I’s legs becoming “ours”.

If this happens again, and you want to leave, just go.
If you want to go, don’t stay.
Don’t stay because you feel compelled to tell me how much better this felt.
I don’t think I care.
But maybe you could make me, lady.

Could he compete with me
When I’ve already won the game?
As the sun came up to shine a light on his debt,
You kept yourself awake with my name.

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